Breaking up..

God! im feeling soo miserable...
i kno not only im at fault for writing in after soooo many days... months... dunno....
i also feel sooo bad about myself... well... i still think i didnt do nething wrong.. its about me meeting sme1... soo good... he loved me..:O i know hard to believe..:( nd then i went ahead and broke up with him.... i broke up with him... even though im pretty sure his feelings for me r true...
my reason? i dnt love him...
more over i feel like i'd do smething wrong... like agaisnt the law of nature if i go around with ne guy.. i just feel ki mein mom dad ko betray karungi is sab se...:(

and still i feel bad... like he changed his tagline on orkut... as if he is colin me a hypocrite.. he says he doesnt miss me.. he misses who he thot i am..:(
i dunno y i want him to be understanding... nd dunno.. what i want.. i just want him to understand my side of the story.

but the truth is.. he cant.. like when i was in love with sme1 nd tht fool :D didnt love me bak.. i was miserable... yea i kno hard to believe the feminist was in love.. lols.. neway i was miserable.. and smetimes i till am.. similarly with him... its just unlike my love... i want him to get all right... i wish i felt the same way for him... or better yet i didnt feel wrong in the thing abt me with ne guy at all... like if i cud afford to hv a bf.. then i'd never leave him... but i jus dnt think i can afford a relationship...:(
nd seeing all the other ppl so happy with there bf's gf's makes me soooo jealous...

what am i to do..?:(:(